Imagine you are playing poker. There are two players. Anorexia and your body. The chips symbolize who has control. Sometimes Anorexia has all the chips. Sometimes your body has all the chips. Sometimes it is half and half. You have to decide who you want to side with. But the game is not easy. Anorexia has a well practiced poker face. You want to believe what it is telling you. You desperately want to believe you can side with it and win. But your body is crying out for you to help it. It desperately needs the chips. It needs you to give it control. It needs you to listen to it and nourish it. But Anorexia is good at bluffing. It is telling you it has all the cards to win once and for all. It is a promise of happiness. Deep down you know it is a lie. Somewhere along the way you discover that siding with Anorexia just brings misery and a whole lot of useless cards. But you feel like gambling. You feel like sticking with it just in case. Yet at some point you have to make the decision to switch sides. You have to realise that you cannot keep gambling. Because in reality this is not a game of cards. You are gambling with your life.
Your body may not have the highest cards. It may not even have the cards to win every round. But you have to choose to stick with it. You have to believe deep down that you and your body can eventually win the game. There may be times you waver, there may be times when you long to side with Anorexia because you are so desperate for the high and adrenaline starving gives you. But you have to be strong. You have to hold your ground. You have to side with your body because its promises of health and happiness are true. Your body does not bluff. Your body is not manipulative. Your body wants to survive but it needs your help. It needs you to help it win. And you need to make sure that Anorexia is left with nothing.