I know you’re scared right now. I know the anxiety of Christmas feels like a knot in your stomach. I know you wish with all your heart that you could be normal. I know you wish you could eat freely and laugh properly. I know you wish you could tell everyone how incredible your year has been. I know you wish your biggest achievement of the year wasn’t that you’re still here. Whatever your diagnosis. I know you wish it didn’t have to come to Christmas with you.
But you’re not alone and I’m so proud of you. You are a warrior. It might feel impossible, but you can get through it. Eat what you can. Challenge yourself if you feel able and try to distract yourself with the conversation. You may even be able to enjoy it. But if you don’t that’s ok too. No one is judging you. You have an illness and that’s not your fault. Just know that there are people that care. There are helplines you can call. There are friends that will listen.
I’m so sorry you feel the way you do – but it won’t be like this forever. I promise. Deep breaths. It’s going to be tough – but I have so much faith in you. One day Christmas will feel easier, and maybe you’re not there yet. And that’s ok. Your feelings are valid. And never punish yourself for feeling the way you do. Do your best, and that’s all anyone can ask of you.
I’m wishing you all a very happy and healthy Christmas and I hope the New Year will bring beautiful things and new adventures.
All my love and take care guys
2 thoughts on “Christmas – The hardest day of the year (2/2)”
This is lovely. Thank you for this. What you wrote about not punishing yourself for the way you feel is so key. For me, half of the battle with my mental illness is convincing myself that, despite it, I am no less worthy of love and happiness. Wishing you all the best in the new year, Jenny.
Hi Ryan – thank you so much for your comment. I’m sorry that you’re suffering too. But remember that it isn’t your fault that you’re ill. And there will be people in your life that understand that and there will be others that won’t. The key is to hold onto the people who care and want to help and allow yourself to believe them when they tell you how much you’re worth. One of my favourite quotes is “life is too short to spend another day at war with yourself”
Take care and Happy New Year for when it comes
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